Maybe it was good that the movie was so miserable. Maybe it was good that its view of gay life so bleak. Maybe had it been some charming, romantic movie showing all the joy in life, I would have been miserable. I probably would have cuddled up with my pillow and wished for something like the thing on screen, sad because it is currently absent in my life.
But the movie, Free Fall, instead played up how hard, how difficult, how miserable gay life is. And it is in some places for a lot of people, yes, but it just seemed way off for a movie taking place in present day Germany. I grew up watching movies like this, gay-themed movies from the 90s too numerous to count, too unmemorable to even remember by name, in which the gays get their comeuppance, in which they suffer because of their sexuality, racked with guilt as they struggle to accept themselves, shunned by society and loved ones, unhappy endings all around.
Are we really still making movies like this?
The year is 2014. Where is the joy? Where is the fun? Where is the sense of play? I know that there are some movies out there that depict this but then to come across this movie, which has good reviews and which several of my friends have been recommending, I get really confused and I get really angry.
But it just means I need to depict the world I know. There is such a beautiful gay world out there that I get to participate in. I am so happy to be gay and to get to participate in this gay Brooklyn life, to have such amazing friends. Life is fucking awesome and I wouldn't have it any other way.