Saturday, April 17, 2004

I had a customer ask me, "Is there a problem?" while I was working at the information desk, where I was stuck all day today. I was honestly confused, not trying to be a smartass, and asked her: "A problem with what?" And then something about Well, your attitude. I didn't realize I was being such a bitch to people today, but interactions like this made me realize I was. My mind was elsewhere and I wasn't smiling and making small talk and all of a sudden I am really mean. I was not in the mood to deal with stupid people today and got short with more than a few people, practically got in a shouting match with some asshole about the meaning of If, because he asked me if we had a specific book where it would be, and I said If we had it, it would be blah blah blah. He took this to mean that yes, we had this book even though I prefaced that If by saying we didn't have the book, but if we did. . .

And you don't care. I really don't either. So instead, I will tell you that I saw Robby from New College today. But this is while I was stuck behind the info desk and could not talk long, nor could I show real enthusiasm like I would have had I not been interacting with idiots all day. Perhaps in even more exciting news, I got paid two personal days last week even though I have already used all my personal days. I was worried my check was going to be teeny tiny, but by some graceful act of God, the payroll people did not check how many sick days I've taken already or just didn't care. I don't know. I am not planning on bringing it to their attention. This makes me really happy. I am reading Virginia Woolf's The Waves right now. That also makes me really happy. And then the weather, of course. Seventy degrees today. In heat, I smell people's bodies, smell sex, want to take part in all of this spring loving I see around me, birds chasing each other through the air, people kissing everywhere. It is the weather, and I am infected also.

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