Friday, June 8, 2007

without clothes, made both vulnerable and free

Sperm in water is a funny thing, like oil in water. It sticks together, the little clumps, and floats slowly through the water, slow enough for you to meditate on the thing, pause and consider that this, this odd looking substance, is the thing which released, freed from your body, is giving you so much pleasure in that moment.

I went to the nude beach today, Haulover Beach, with Bruce. Naked, surrounded by lots of men, most of them unsexy, was enough to stimulate me, my being unaccustomed to being naked and allowed to in such a public place. I laid stomach down to hide this stimulation until it passed.

After sitting in the heat of Miami in June, warm, drunk off the heat, I went into the ocean to cool off, dove into the surf and found myself unable to touch the bottom with my feet. I treaded water for a while, floating on my back and observed my penis right beneath the surface of the Atlantic Ocean, that massive body of water I am lucky enough to be able to play in this week.

Some man found his way over to my direction, a Chuck, and we talked for a while about where we were from, about the differences between swimming in lakes and oceans, and about getting boners at that particular beach. We stood close to each other and kept on diving underneath the water, doing little dives beneath the surface so that our asses were visible as they rose above the surface and then went under, this really erotic flirting that had nothing explicit about it, nothing other than swimming. I said goodbye and swam back in, really happy with this interaction.

On the shore, Bruce, a bit annoyed, complained about how he was glad I had made new friends but he didn't have anyone to put sunscreen on his back because I was in the water for so long. I told him he could have just laid on his back and started to read my book, a bit annoyed that there are these contrasts, beautiful moments with people in pleasant moods and, so soon after, encounters with people in totally different mental states, ones that are enemies of your current mental state.

I soon went back into the water and swam really far out, swam out to this sandbar about fifty feet out. My new friend, Chuck, soon appeared again. We talked again, nothing flirty in the talk whatsoever, the conversation as bland and polite as possible, but here we were naked in each other's company and both had big smiles on our faces, both of us doing slow dives beneath the surface, showing off for each other but not saying so, floating on our backs, making our penises visible to the other. The water was about waist high and in this exposing water, we started doing handstands. He would do one and his penis, because of the low water, would stick out just above the surface. I would follow by doing the same. We got closer and closer to each other as we did these handstands, so that soon we were inches from each other, each having really close views of the other's dick.

We had still yet to even touch, to even say anything that would imply that that might happen with each other; it was instead just this really erotically charged form of play. By this point, I had a pretty big boner that was visible to both of us just below the surface of the ocean. Bruce was at the shore, far off enough to not know what was going on, but knowing that he was right there made this situation probably more exciting that it would have otherwise been, though, yes, it would have been exciting even then, very exciting - to be out in the sun, on a gorgeous Miami beach, on a sandbar with this other cute man, a bit older but cute still, who was into showing off his body.

Finally - finally - touch happened. He made to do it gently, passing his hand past my penis so if I were offended, it could have been claimed an accident. I am not the type to get offended by such things and smiled when he did so, touched his thigh and leaned my hips in, jutting my penis in his direction, making it clear that I wanted it touched. He started to tug on my penis and it felt so great. There were several other people on this sandbar not too far away and I must admit it, though you probably already know, that that also turned me on, the brazenness of what we were doing. I started to play with his penis also and our legs made contact, hips pressing against each other, and water gliding in between your skin as it makes contact with that of another is such an amazing feeling - it made me, the entire scene did, so happy. He jerked me off until I came and we watched, between the two of us, my semen bunch up together and trail slowly through this beautiful water.

Afterward, I went back to the shore, Bruce there unaware of anything, and laid down on my towel and looked at all the other naked men around me and felt so happy, so much better.

Things have been going really good ever since yesterday, basically right since I wrote how miserable I was. Bruce and I finally had sex yesterday. He was more pleasant. We drank cocktails at his house, ate dinner, and then went to some cheesy gay bar, Twist, where I had a really fun time. He left early on and encouraged me to stay, and so I did, not needing that much encouragement, and I chatted with some nice people, made out with one person, and danced to a lot of really terrible music, but, man, oh man, what fun I had doing so!

Driving to and back from the beach today, we listened to the classic rock station at my insistence and that, too, aided so much in making today a fairly amazing day. Those songs have so many associations for me, most pleasant, and as I am riding in a car, driving along sun bleached roads, sublime cloud formations every way you look, the effects of those associations become something overwhelming, beautifully so, my heart throbbing with the joy of it, with the fact that these things are and that I am for a bit also.

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