Monday, May 12, 2008

These days are containing more and more. A lot occurred over these past couple of days and to attempt to transcribe those moments, so many of them, would require too much from me right now, particularly so since I have just spent the last five hours transcribing the moments of other people, transcribing a panel discussion on the utility industry. And out of necessity and my desire to actually get some sleep tonight, this will be briefer than I would otherwise like and certain moments that perhaps had I had hours to sit here and write might have been included most certainly will not. I cannot for this reason go into detail about the feelings I felt last night when this mildly creepy person gave me coke and kept on asking me to kiss him on the cheek, how he was tainted, old and trying to be young, mentioning his youth at a couple points and really looking too old to me, too old and yet to stupid to be as old as he looked.

And, really, so what? So what if certain moments are not documented here, this my substitute memory since my real one so rarely works? The moments were lived and certainly aren't any less lived for not being recorded.

Yesterday, Niki and I painted our house this lovely shade of purple. We did this as we drank forties of beer and blasted classic rock. It was really beautiful and made me like both Niki and this house in a very sentimental way. Also while painting, drunk on beer and classic rock blaring, I thought to myself that I would paint for any of my friends their apartments so long as this was the setup: beer by my side, nice old classic rock tunes in my ears.

After cleaning ourselves and our floors of paint drips, we went to Long Island City to the new Deitch space for the Assume Vivid Astro Focus opening. The space was psychedelic insanity, a massive warehouse space given over to bright colors and madness and balloons. There were noise bands, lots of booze, an amazing view of Manhattan, and so many nice people to talk to, to have connections with. From there, I went to Family for Bob's graduation party and on the way ran into Evan. Blah, blah, blah - this I did this, then this listing of items surely boring, but I am running on empty - and running into Evan was lovely and I dragged him to 40C with us and chatted to him a bunch there and on the streets, this old crush from the Strand, possibly a current crush, but the dynamics having changed, him actually being interested in conversation with me, perhaps me playing it a bit cooler than in days of old, and the two of us talking about Gogol, Rimbaud, Dylan, Wojanrowicz, and Whitman, and other things, yes, but still! Comparing this chat with most of the others from that bar (actually from most anywhere), what a treat to talk about such things, to talk to someone who reads!

He left. I talked to a bunch of other people, none of whom had heard of Bushwick, or if they had did not know where it was, and maybe that doesn't seem like much, but it seemed like everything to me then, seemed like the clearest indication of what type of people I was dealing with.

A boy, Paul, cute brown eyes. Went home with him after him being a bit of a dick to me. See earlier referenced cute brown eyes for reason why. He was weird. Claimed to have never drank tap water. Seemingly true given his weirdness. Also had AC on on a chilly night and lots of shoes in his closet in boxes. Despite him saying he just wanted to hang out, he started sucking on my dick, something I surely did not mind, comfy as I was in his bed, it a bit colder than I would have liked, excited about cumming and sleeping in such a nice bed. His phone rang and then doorbell rang and he freaked out and told me I had to get dressed. He was out front for a bit while I laid underneath his covers ready to fall asleep, exhausted from a long day, and made all the more excited about sleep by this fancy bed, so comfortable. He came back, told me he was in a relationship, and that I couldn't stay. This I did mind. I felt like shit, was really unexcited about trekking home on the fucked up L at four something in the morning, had been so excited about sleeping in this bed, and these are the type of people that do not know what Bushwick is, that have never drank tap water, and that even though only 22 used to (yes, past tense for a 22 year old) own a tanning salon.

I left, called Diego, who had just gotten home, and who told me I could come over. He was a bit drunk and so a bit more honest than usual and told me things he had been thinking about, about how I don't treat him nicely, or haven't been lately. And we cuddled in his twin-sized bed, hugging each other as we faded into sleep. This morning, woke up and had sex I really enjoyed, enjoyed even more because my affection for this boy had been heightened by the night sleeping with him and his sweetness. He is really special and I was really happy for him in my life today.

Niki and I did more cleaning this morning, this day, ate some Mexican food, and listened to more classic rock. There was all this transcribing I had to do, and now there is this sleep ahead of me and beyond that days and days and nights.

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