So people always complain about jury duty in the same way that they complain about getting dental work done, and today, I know why. So I got there bright and early at 8:45, and joined the hundreds of other irritated Brooklynites waiting in line with their jury duty summons waiting to go through the metal detector. After I got through that, I went to this big room with 748 chairs. (I counted at one point when I was bored silly.) The room was about twenty degrees and after watching a boring video about how jury duty is a civic obligation, a woman came out to give us some instructions. Apparently, we were supposed to bring a pen to write information on our jury card. It said this on the jury card, and yet only about half the people had pens, the other half, bad students doing the SATs, were asking neighbors if they could borrow their pen. I, sadly, was one of these. People are so funny. This was funny, people, adults made childish, in hushed tones asking to borrow pens.
Also funny was when how the woman had to scold all of us and tell us that we had to be here, and no we couldn't go, unless we had a kid to take care of, or a verifiable medical condition. Then she said if anyone didn't think they could serve because they didn't understand English, that they could get processed and leave. Depsite the fact that it seemed they understood what she said just then, literally half of the room got up to leave. Once they had all left, this woman laughed and told us that most of them would be back, and she was correct. Just about all of them came back after being told by the screener that they would be called to come back in another six months. By sitting through the day, we don't have to report for jury duty for at least another six years.
And then we waited. And waited. And waited. I finished my book that I had brought, Roberto Bolano's By Night in Chile by ten, and read free newspapers cover to cover that were lying around the room. After a couple hours, they called some people, twenty or so out of of the two hundred or so up to be a prospective jury. Then it was lunch time, and I went in search of a used book store and found a Goodwill where I bought a Jane Austen book, which was defintely not what I wanted to read, but far better than all the Star Trek paperbacks that were the alternative there.
Finally, at four, they dismissed us. I was kind of disappointed. For all that waiting, I didn't even get to see a courtroom or a jury box, didn't get to experience this thing. I don't even want to detail the day because it was so tedious and boring and cold, and I would lose my mind if I had to do so. I am free though now. I did, however, find out that my job is supposed to pay me for today, and so tomorrow, I have to go politely make sure they do.
Um, and I am in a great mood because Al motherfucking Green, who I have always wanted to see play is playing a free show at Coney Island in two weeks. And tomorrow Voxtrot is playing a free show at Prospect Park, that I may go to if it is not raining. And tonight, after Jillian finishes moving all her stuff out, I am supposed to move all my stuff, so that Adele can move into my room, so that tomorrow, Ethan can move into hers. And I am so unexcited about that because I am too tired to be moving shit, and fuck fuck fuck! Al Green!
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