Tuesday, July 30, 2002

on my way to and from work, i listen to the same two police songs..

The new Bruce Springsteen album is out, and I have not been so excited about purchasing a new album since high school. I just want it. I want to own it. To read the lyrics again and again until I have them memorized, to be able to play it whenever I want, morning, noon, night, or whathaveyou. I have no cash in my bank account. That does not matter. I am resourceful, I am an American, I have a $300 credit limit on my credit card and it is still at least $80 away from being maxed out, and goddamn, if I should try to be digging my way out of this debt and not be making indulgent purchases. Goddamn that line of thinking, I motherfucking want the CD, and tomorrow, I am going to the record store where Adam (Vagina Boy) works and hopefully he will be there, and I will motherfucking purchase it, and play that shit out like the end is near. During our little drive around Madison on Saturday night, I told Adam I was going to come buy it from him, and how excited I was about it, he laughed and said I reminded him of his good friend. Of someone he knew.

I had meant to buy it today, but after work, I was so damn pooped, not from working, however, since my job is the easiest job in the world, but from having to wake up at 6:45 to be at work at 8 o'clock sharp. Today, I really didn't even start working until 10:30, I just got paid to sit around for two and a half hours. Literally. They didn't even turn on the phones until 10:30. There was a brief staff meeting for half an hour at eight, where the employees petitioned for an aerobics period at the beginning of work, where we would all stretch together. This job is so funny, I could not even imagine that being asked for at any of my previous jobs. Gary Cha would hit me with a broom if I even had the audacity to jokingly ask for paid aerobics time. After the humourous meeting and until ten everyone just sat around and talked, read books and parenting magazines at their desks, waiting for 10:00, their first break. And at ten o'clock on the dot, everyone sighed a relief like they had been working on the railroad all the live long day, and breaked for fifteen minutes exactly. Not one second less. This job is so funny. I love it. I cannot believe I get paid $8.50 an hour to just sit at my desk and talk to all the moms around me about their kids. The person that trained me today is 22, and has a four year old and a three year old. During my lunch break, I just sat at my desk and tried to eat and read instead of going out to the break room with all the many people that I do not know. But, this other young mother came up to me and talked to me forever about Florida since she is moving back there, and I really am pretty sure she was trying to hit on me. She was just standing in front of my desk all goofy and shy and playing with her hair and trying to engage me in conversation way past the point at which I kept on trying to make a break, tried to make it obvious that I just wanted to read my book.

Anyways, the girl that trained me was funny and goofy, just like the people from yesterday, and the woman next to her, who is at least fifty and so Wisconsin, cussed like there was no tomorrow all the time. It was so funny to hear her saying fuck fuck fuck. I really like bitchin' old people that are crude - they are so cool. She told me that we needed to grow me "boobies" if I was going to sit with "the bitchin' bitches." So yeah, back to the point, or the attempt at one, after working I was so tired, and I had to go the store to get ingredients to make Magic Cookie Bars for our "munchies day" tomorrow at work. I came home, cooked them, and decided I was going nowhere, that I was too tired to go get Bruce, to buy him and something else, some part of me. But, I did read a really obnoxious cover story in Time about him, a copy that I yanked from the mail downstairs, a copy addressed to Hans Nelson, who no longer lives here. I also read a fairly fun memoir type thingy on this one guy's Springsteen memories in Salon, all of which made me very eager to listen to the new album, to talk to Adam, to make out with someone in a basement, to have sex with Giancarlo again, and to do all sorts of fun things. But, I can't, or at least not right now, I have to postpone the fun, put it on hold. I have to go to bed so I can wake up again tomorrow at six fucking forty five.

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