Wednesday, March 23, 2005

I am just getting back from the Metropolitan and a really crazy trip it was. God, my heart is still beating so fast from all the excitement. You may think I am petty because it was nothing more than encountering crushes, my oh my God, the crushes encountered was crazy. This evening I went to Matt's show with Gabriel. On my way there I encountered Paul, who showed me a mock-up of this photo zine he had made. It was awesome. Matt's show was awesome. He was dreamy. I then went to Niki's store! Um, yeah Niki has a store and I went to that. And this was one, two, three, pow! Three of my peers in a row all going after thing and reaching what they were grabbing for, being really successful. Today has inspired me so much and I don't really know if I can talk about too much now because I am really drunk and still giddy and typing quietly for fear of waking my roommates, me out here in the living room typing loudly away past three in the morning.

Tonight, I signed up to sing karaoke, Billy Joel's "Tell Her About It," because I really like the song, but Charlie, my crush, was there and I was so nervous after I signed up, so worried about performing in front of him. I didn't talk to him, of course, because I was way embarrassed about that last message I wrote to him about wanting to make out with him. He came up to me while I was engaged in conversation with Joe, went out of his way, and said "Hi CHARLIE!" It blew my mind. I said hi back. But my crush who I told I wanted to make out with, went out of his way to say hello to me and it is probably a sign that he is rececptive to the making out, but he said that as he was leaving and that made me a lot more sane that I would not have to perform this song I didn't even know they lyrics to in front of him. But really confused as to whether he liked me or not.

Enter Matt and Kevin. I talked to Matt throughout the night, later with the assistance of Gabriel's friendliness, and really, I am so obsessed and am probably going to go masturbate right now to thoughts of this boy. I will not lie. I would sleep with him in a half second and probably bark like a dog at his command. I am so infatuated with him still. I don't think it is sick. You should have seen him in this tight t-shirt. I smoked lots of Canadian cigarettes tonight. I have to work tomorrow, my first time going back after being demoted. Maybe tomorrow, I will write something that I proofread, something that makes sense. Maybe.

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