I look at his profile just about every day on Friendster and stare at pictures of him. I notice when he changes it up and puts a new picture on his profile. This one, for instance. And then, I will stare at it, not in a horny way where I mentally or physically masturbate to it. But sort of a Magic Eye image where I just stare almost past the image, thinking really nothing, hoping to see something, giddy, imagining just talking to him. This is how crushes work for me. I really do believe that I take crushes more seriously (more scarily?) than other people. And then five minutes will go by with me staring at my computer screen and I will ask myself rhetorically what I am doing, because really I know the answer to it, have always known the answer whenever I have pretended to ask myself the question about crushes. I want to go the Metropolitan right now and hope that he is there.
Instead, I am going to lie in bed because my throat is sore so I shouldn't drink, plus there is the fact that I am broke and shouldn't for that reason also. I have been reading a book I have had for six months or so now sitting beside my bed, David Mitchell's Cloud Atlas, and so far, I love it. I just read, "A half-read book is a half-finished love affair." And not that I have experience with love affairs or anything, but man, I loved that line and felt it to be true.
I downloaded the new Daft Punk and Bloc Party albums today. I just want to dance to Daft Punk until I die. Also, tickets to NIN go on sale on Friday and not that I have forty five dollars to be blowing on loud, industrial bands, but I really want to go. I took a shower this morning blaring The Downward Spiral and feeling so good. I am a glutton for these things, these pleasures and I love it that there are these things capable of providing pleasure to me, that there is so much of it. Quick, name that song lyric: It's neverending. I've got pictures of crushes thanks to Friendster, Daft Punk, loud music from high school to shower to, David Mitchell. What more could I want? PS, my Free Will horoscope has confirmed that this is going to be a very good week. Geminis, rejoice:
Events in the coming week may be difficult for some of you to deal with. They will include intense encounters with peace, love, joy, and understanding, as well as possible brushes with extravegent beauty, lyrical delight, and inspiring discoveries. There will be a dearth of story lines the feature betrayal, abuse, pettiness, greed, extortion, disease, and explosions. Therefore, Gemini, you should proceed with extreme caution if you're a jaded hipster who's suspicious of feeling really good. Ask yourself: "Am I ready to stop equating cynicism with insight? Do I dare take the risk that exposing myself to uplifting encounters might might dull my intelligence?" If you doubt your ability to handle all the relaxing breakthroughs, you'd better take strong measures to evade them.
And if you're not a Gemini, you can go ahead and pretend this is for whatever sign you are. Isn't this the best horoscope ever?
PS - Isn't he the cutest boy on Planet Earth?