Friday, April 29, 2005

Niki just asked me what is wrong with me, and really I don't know what the cause is but I don't feel like doing anything ever. There is no place more comfortable to me than my own apartment and even when I do go out, I cannot wait to get back to my apartment. I had been really excited about the gallery openings happening tonight and had made plans with three different people to go with them, Paul, Joe, and Niki. I just cancelled plans with all three of them. I didn't want to see anybody I knew, telling all three of them different reasons because there aren't really any reasons and I was grasping at plausible ones, trying to see if they were true. Television is a depressent and surely, the fact that I watched eight epidoes of The O.C. yesterday and four today had something to do with this. I really feel tired and exhausted and the only exercise I did today, the only thing even close to physical exertion was taking the trash down three flights of stairs to the curb. And yet, I am tired and moody. Luckily, I finished all the episodes and so now hopefully I can stay away from the couch, from that television. I hope so, but who knows. Maybe I should just go to galleries and get over this stupidness. Maybe the Whitney. Maybe Jillian just got home and I should turn off the stereo which is blaring the Gossip, has been blaring it on repeat for the past couple hours, and the album is probably only about twenty minutes long. That is what type of day it is.

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