Forget those days when you just don't know the answers, when you can't figure out what to do, because those days are preferable to this one so far and yesterday, the ones where there aren't any questions, let alone answers.
I am finding myself masturbating more frequently and that is normally a symptom also, a general boredom, not knowing what to do with yourself, not even asking that question, but waking up, eating food, going to work, picking up a Woody Allen movie on the way home and then going to bed - going through the motions. I hesitate to call it living. Surely, I am breathing and pumping blood, but not much else beside that.
A week from today, I am going to take an hour long ferry ride to my mom's new house not too far from the beach at Atlantic Highlands. I am looking forward to that boat ride, to some change in scenery. I have still yet to purchase my mom or her husband any sort of Christmas gift, have yet to even give it more than passing thought and don't plan on doing it until Friday when I get paid.